Yesterday I didn’t study as much as I wanted to. I want to study for 2 hours daily, but I only studied for 1 hour. Well it can’t be helped. I will just try to study for two hours today.
I chatted with someone last night and I feel I am done with men. So most guys (married or single) want to have sexual relationships with women. That is like their goal. Women want to have sex too, but women are pickier than men because I think it is our biological makeup from evolution. So I was talking with this guy who told me the same thing that my sex buddy said, “I love my wife very much!” “My wife loves me very much!” “But I have sexual needs.” According to him, his wife is very traditional. He would not mind if she cheated on him as long as he doesn’t know about it. But since she is very traditional, she is not going to cheat on him.
So he is trying to find another woman. It makes sense that he is in love with wife and he just tries to find another person to fulfill his biological needs. He thinks he is being fair to her in the sense that he loves her the same with or without another woman. His love for his wife is exclusive. For him, then love is separate in the body and in the mind. One can be in love or being attached to someone because he and his loved one share the same value, but since one’s body has needs to be satisfied, having sex with another person does not involve love, but perhaps some affection.
All is understood, but the problem is, when I asked him, what if she cheats on him? Can he take it? And he said, he is okay with it as long as he doesn’t finds out. Then I asked, so he is okay with both of them doing their own thing (seeing someone else without having the married partner know about it)? Then he said his wife is traditional so she is not going to fool around. So basically he is saying that it’s okay for him to fool around and having sex with other people but he doesn’t think his wife will fool around with other men. “Some women are sexually open-minded.”
He expects himself to find someone, any woman who is open to sex and finds him attractive. But my question is, if he is looking for any person who he can find or who is attractive enough for him to want to have sex with, then what is the reason for a person to choose him out of others? It’s like choosing a watermelon: if you choose a watermelon out of a lot of watermelons, what makes you choose that particular one? I guess sometimes I choose in random, but having sex with another person is not like choosing a watermelon.
So I told him, “What a happy couple you are” and I am not the one he is looking for.