If we were to think of power as energy, would it be real energy or would it be imaginative energy? If power is energy, as one says, “He is a powerful man.”, what would it be in the form of physics?

Back to the washing-up problem. My friend’s question to me: “Why should I listen to you when you tell me not to help you to do the washing-up?” Was I not fair to her by refusing her help? Perhaps the question is: what is necessary? Sometimes we try to be fair because we want to avoid feeling guilty, but the effort would only make things worse when everything ends up in a power struggle.

As for me, having real power is to know what one perceives as reality. Only when a person knows the reality of her own perception, can she know the perception of another person, and then the rest of the world. Only then she can have the freedom to choose to create herself.

Whatever the cause of my effort to study philosophy, it’s not important. The important thing is one’s effort: the process. I don’t know why I was born, but the fact is I was born, and the process of living is what matters to me.

Even though context matters to an interpretation, it only takes a sentence alone to deliver a message. An idea is supposed to conclude the context, the context, “The world is the case.”, as Wittgenstein said it.



Today was M’s first day of school. We also booked the hotel for our trip to Singapore.

It’s good to know there is something on my mind, only I find it there is often too much. I need to uncluttered my mind by writing.

I got overwhelmed by many things I needed to do this afternoon: to register for the security net for the junior high school PTA, to fill out forms, to apply for airline membership, to check and return a student’s homework, to check the school calendar, to do the washing-up, and make dinner.

The only way to finish a long to-do list is to inhale, exhale, and do one thing at a time. The trick: do what you don’t feel like doing first, so you can enjoy life later.



Tomorrow is M’s ceremony for entering junior high school, so I want to go to sleep early because I don’t want to be late. My inability to estimate the time for me to get somewhere makes me end up hating myself.

Something negative might turn out to be a positive thing. Likewise, it’s also possible for something positive to turn out to be negative. Say I felt low and stayed home all day, but I finished going over my account and filled out forms for school. I also practiced piano and cooked dinner. Spending a lousy day at home actually turned out to be quite a productive experience for me.

Seeing something to be a good experience, or a bad one is just a matter of perspective. The most important thing for me is protecting my writing time. If there is anything I need to do for myself, it’s write. One’s priority determines how one will relate to the world.

Life has an underlying structure of one’s existence even if it’s not always obvious to him/her. The person who creates himself/herself is a person who changes his/her old pattern of thinking successfully. I think I’ll start with my closet.



Even though I tried to look calm in front of the students, I went totally nuts when I forgot the time I was supposed to finish the lesson. I thought I still had 30 minutes left in the lesson, but I had already finished the material I had prepared. I ended up trying to show the clip from our piano recital, but it took so long we just quit trying to watch it all together. My distortion of the finishing time of the lesson made me bring up my idea of the play I prepared for the students.

I like the idea of a play because a play is more fun than daily conversation. There is more imagination in a play than a real life situation. Real life situation is real—it’s basically problem solving, whereas one can have fun with one’s imagination while practicing the language at the same time in a play.

My style is the open-ended question approach, even though that makes me sound undecided. The message from the movie, ”My dinner with Andre” was that people want answers right away, and “..It makes us have no time to think..The questions just scare people.” But I seem to enjoy questioning.



The metal part of my tooth fell out when I was flossing, so I went to see the dentist. I said, “Thank you for a good job cleaning my teeth.” to the cleaning staff. She always does her job thoroughly. I was glad that I paid her the compliment with my gratitude, not only because I meant it, but also because I had the courage and the language skill to express myself.

A blogger says that the 75th piece of writing should look different from the 1st piece. I feel my thoughts flow smoothly when I write, and my ideas come out easier than before, when the words stick to what I try to express. But whenever I think about the possibility of becoming successful, my old self-doubt crept back in.

Socrates never wrote a book, but his ideas last through generations. Knowledge is about ideas. No matter how a person lived his life, his idea is what really matters to the world.

Einstein did his study while he was working at a paid job. I think my work in teaching gives me enough freedom to do what I am interested in too.



The weather was pretty rough today. After M went to the movies, the storm warning alert came. I spent all morning trying to download the piano recital’s video and share it, but it didn’t work. I was struggling and basically just too lazy to do anything else, but I managed to go out for lunch with E.

How can one not acknowledge a writer’s background when trying to understand his philosophy? It’s like understanding a sentence without its context, or seeing a tree without seeing the tree being part of the forest.

I am tired of typing the word “Nietzsche”. I am just going to call him N. N’s text made me think he was lonely because his words revealed what kind of situation he was in. N’s idea idea on human subjective understanding is the same concept Kant has, but N has a political aim.

If I were to pick someone I want to pretend to be, I’d pick a writer; I don’t need to pretend to be someone else.
I can forgive myself for not understanding a concept, but I cannot forgive myself for not doing what I am inclined to do, which is to understand.



M had the graduation ceremony at the elementary school. Even though I could have been very nervous about it, I was not so nervous because I have been writing to get fear and anxiety out of my mind, and I try to follow my intuition. Trusting my intuition helps me in an amazing way, and writing helps me to get through life.

It was my idea to ask K to participate in the seminar, and the idea was very logical. However, I panicked when he told me he couldn’t understand the reading. The best I can do is to translate the text for him, but he has to look up all the vocabulary he doesn’t know. Anyway, I hope it will turn out okay.

I was disappointed to know the Chinese astrological sign of someone I know. I suddenly lost interest in him completely. Why am I stereotyping a person based on his animal sign? It’s not fair.

Finally, I told R that we don’t need to meet in person, and he agreed to it. It’s not because I don’t want to see him, it’s just because it’s not necessary, and I am too lazy to see him.



Today we went to a park and only stayed there for 20 minutes because it was too cold. After seeing the dentist, my teeth have become so clean that they don’t look like my teeth! Anyway, I tried to get my teeth back to normal by drinking coffee.

If I don’t read philosophy, I feel something is missing. I certainly don’t need philosophy to survive. Does studying philosophy make me feel special? Am I trying to prove myself?

Philosophy can be very self-evident sometimes, but I guess the people practice it need to go through the process. The process is where the work is: intuition and logic!

I need something that I can study, just like I need to write, and philosophy happens to be what I am interested in. I want to see what my reality is made of, or what I perceive to be true.


The advice of writing in the morning before one does anything else is just too difficult for me. I have to do so many things before I can finally feel comfortable enough to write, and if I think I need to write asap, I will drive myself crazy.

Nietzsche and Kant might be saying the same thing when they emphasize different points. Nietzsche made his point on the responsibility of leaders, whereas Kant wants everyone to be responsible for his life, but basically, they both think one has a place in the world, and the person is not to neglect his responsibility.

Maybe I can jot down some notes in the notebook as ideas come to me, and then go back to elaborate on the ideas. If I can review an edited journal and edit another one in the morning, schedule a post for my blog in the afternoon, write what’s on my mind at night, like now, I would be sufficiently productive.

I need to get out and exercise more. I enjoyed playing tennis with E in Hawaii. I don’t get out of my home when I am in Japan: I don’t walk that much, and I just keep getting fat. It’s a bad cycle, and now I am not happy with how I look.

The thought of a student I know practicing on a broken keyboard because she doesn’t have a piano made me want to practice everyday.

The more work and energy you put into something, the better chance you will get better at it eventually. Whether an action is manifested in conscious or unconscious thoughts, actions produce outcomes. I will only know what I have written until it’s been written; I only hope it’ll be good energy.



The comment Copleston made in the chapter “Retrospect and prospect” in “A History of Philosophy” is pretty depressing. The author ended up saying that philosophy is dialectic, and philosophers just keep repeating themselves. His comment made me want to scream because it might be true.

It was a good life when I was in Hawaii: I didn’t write, I didn’t read, all I did was grocery shopping, cooking, and spending time with the kids playing tennis. I thought I was functioning normally without writing, until catching a cold made me “imagine” I’d be sick if I did’t write.

Maybe writing has become a habit for me because later I felt upset when I didn’t keep my journal. If I could admit to myself that I wanted to get better at writing, then I would have to face the fact that I needed to discipline myself to get better.

As for the piano recital, I tried to be at the place that relates to the music when I played: I saw the park, and it worked. With practice and learning the trick of image training, I have conquered my fear in playing in front of an audience.